|Make more time for my family|
Of course, setting the goal is only part of it - action is the second step and I guess this is where a lot of us get stuck (I'm not saying 'fail', just stuck). The trouble is, life gets in the way. The commitments, the responsibilities, even the mundane everyday stuff - dishes, washing, picking up and dropping off.... There are plenty of free ideas floating round the webosphere on how to physically make the time to work on your goals, but I think one reason for 'stuck' has nothing to do with the physical and everything to do with the emotional.
|Be more forgiving of others|
Somewhere along the way I got so fearful of failing it shut down my creativity. I wasn't willing to start anything because it wouldn't turn out the way I planned and therefore it would be a big 'ol 'F' for fail.
Yes I was in the grip of perfectionism and it totally changed who I was. For three years I didn't design, I didn't sew, I didn't write, I didn't paint, I didn't craft.....and I wasn't 'failing' but I had a constant nagging dissatisfaction with my life - because for a creative, not creating is like not breathing - kinda impossible.
The turning point for me was an invitation from a friend curating an exhibition. The brief was so wide open (create a collage) - anything I did was a success. In fact the only way to fail was to not do it. So I did it. I didn't invest too much thought into the outcome, it was just an outpouring of pent up creativity. It got me started again, and yes I still felt like a failure, but I did it anyway. It was a 'fake it till you make it' stage in my life. Single Dad Laughing wrote a very thought provoking post on perfection here and I encourage you to read it - its really powerful stuff!
|Be kinder to myself|
Part of that is acknowledging that the goal posts change constantly. In fact, when you are setting your goals its pretty much the only thing you can be certain of. Things will change, you will change and you know what? That's great - humans evolve - we're designed that way!! Maybe on your journey from here to there you will realise you don't actually want to be there at all. I can't count the number of times I have stubbornly continued on a path I knew wasn't quite right for me, because to change my course would not fulfil my goal, therefore I would fail that goal. What a waste of my time and energy! Being flexible about your goal and about how you achieve it isn't cheating or woosing out, its being realistic and you know what - it will get you there.
Seriously, give yourself a break. Your life isn't an exam, its your life. Its not meant to be perfect, but I reckon its meant to be fun and meaningful and fulfilling. Where's the fun and fulfillment in beating yourself up for not achieving that goal? Who does this serve? Chances are if you stop listening to that internal voice that tells you your useless and a failure and whats the point the world if full of more talented, more imaginative creatives than you (trust me I've been there), you'll hear and see and feel others around you saying "Your wicked/talented/driven/creative/amazing...".
|Take exercise 3 x 30mins per week|
So set goals I say, dream that dream but know that:
- goalposts are fluid - hey that's life;
- let go of 'perfect'. Holding on to perfect is setting yourself up to fail.
- Be prepared to take a detour. Employing flexibility and creativity around the concept of success is far more likely to get you there. Dang it you deserve to get there, so stop making it so hard to do so!
- Celebrate what you have, rather than focusing too much on what you haven't - its waaay more rewarding
|Stick to the financial plan|